Back in hospital and this time it was a surreal experience I had a Doctor asking if he could examine my rectum!!

I couldn’t stop laughing  as he had a giant torch strapped to his forehead I said “Yes of course but will you be visiting the coal mines afterwards?” I was not met with a chuckle. 

After an admission, endless blood tests and various random questions they decided I had a large tear in my colon and needed to come back for further tests. I had sat in the hospital all day by myself. Nobody knew I was there, I had phoned in sick to work. Writing this now I understand my behaviour was strange but I couldn’t deal with the sympathetic looks, questions or the kind anger “the doctors weren’t doing enough” I was mentally hanging on by a bare thread.  

It was around this time my lovely Nanny passed away. She was elderly and had lived a full life, I missed her dearly but wasn’t traumatised by her passing. She had wanted to go and be with my Grandad and I was pleased for her. She had visited me a few times and we had some good chats. I asked her to help me get better and hadn’t received much guidance from her or spirit. 

One evening I remember going to bed with a huge swollen tummy, exhaustion, blood loss and I was too tired to ask anyone for help least of all connect to spirit. I had been released from another amazing job due to ill health and it was safe to say I was giving up hope. I had started to plan how I could change my life to accommodate permanent ill health. 

I fell asleep that night silently crying and received a visitation from my nanny.  A visitation from spirit is truly incredible you see everything so clearly, your sense of smell is heightened, you can feel the person’s skin. My nan held my cheeks with both her hands and told me to stay strong. Then she said “Katie it’s nothing serious you have food allergies”
I can picture her face now and I said “nan it’s not they checked”
“Trust me it is! Look again” 

I woke the next morning feeling loved, safe with some strength to keep fighting. I made an appointment with the GP and insisted they refer me for further allergy tests…..